Do you ever wish you were a parent 30 or 40 years ago? Times were so different then and sometimes I long for that.
Today it seems like there is a lot of pressure on parents. I don't mean the pressure that I have talked about
before with the judgy folks out there breathing down your necks with every parenting choice you make. But in other ways, there is this pressure.
My husband is one of 5 children. My best friend is one of 4. When they were little, they didn't go out to dinner much at all. My best friend would hide snacks in her room so her siblings wouldn't eat them. My mother in law cooked every night. There was no take out or splurging.
That was the norm. That was okay. It was fine for the husband to work 2 or 3 jobs so the mother could stay home with the children. It was okay that the only vacation you took was at the beach a short 2 hour drive away. I only went to Disney World once as a child. I was in first grade. Besides that trip, all of our vacations were to the Delaware or Jersey shore (shout out to Rehoboth Beach and Wildwood, NJ! ) Even
at the beach, you cooked some meals. You packed lunch to take with you.
But today it is so different.
People have these big houses and upgrade when they have children. One bathroom is pretty much unheard of...but yes, we only have one bathroom right now. Oh, the horror! One bathroom and I have 3 daughters. Whatever will we do. We MUST move, of course. That's what we are told. But the funny thing is that the family who lived here first, the original owners, had 3 daughters and one bathroom. I am sure it was fine back then. Oh, but not today. We better get on that...start checking out something bigger and better.
It seems like everyone is always looking for bigger and better.
Get the brand spanking new, big ass SUV. Get the huge $3000 swing set. Take the kids on the vacation of a life time when they are only 4 years old. Better yet, take lavish vacations by yourself without the kids. Buy the 5+ bedroom house. Send the kids to the best preschool. Who cares if you pay as much as you pay for your mortgage each month. Get your hair done every 6 weeks. God forbid those roots start showing. Wear the best clothes. Make sure your kids have the best clothes. Buy all new furniture.
Everything has to be just right.
If not, that's ashame. You must not be managing your money right. You must not make enough. Your husband must not make enough. What are you doing wrong?
It's really starting to get to me.
And maybe it's because I am in such a rut with this weather. Maybe it's because I am ready for spring. Maybe I need a little break. But nonetheless, it is getting to me.
I long for a simpler time. When kids wore hand me downs, when it was okay to not go on a vacation because money was tight, when it was okay to drive a car for 20+ years, when it was okay to have old furniture that you got second hand, and when everyone was just getting by and you made it work.
If this is what things are like today...in this "bigger and better" society that we are living in, I am fearful for what my children will face in another 20 or 30 years.
I truly am.