Friday, September 23, 2011

Who Is Your "Favorite"?

If you have more than 1 child, which one is your favorite?
Hmmm....that is a bold question, but did one of your children instantly come to mind?

I read an article this morning about parents of more than 1 child having a favorite. I thought it was a very interesting read.  The article said 99% of parents have a favorite and the 1% that don't are lying.
I was pretty shocked...but as I read on, I got a different perspective on the meaning of "favorite"...
It doesn't mean that a parent loves one child more at all.  It just means that parents relate differently to each child.  Each relationship you have with every one of your children is unique.  That is basically human nature.  There might be different aspects of each child's personality that you favor. 
So as I was reading, I realized that I don't necessarily have a favorite...BUT I can pinpoint things about each one of my daughters that I tend to favor.  My oldest has always been very easy to discipline and she is so helpful.  She is "by the books", enthusiastic about everything new, and is a great sidekick for things like shopping.  My second daughter is hilarious.  She makes us laugh everyday...and she is such a talker.  She has a wonderful vocabulary and the cutest personality.  And the baby...well so far, she is so happy and laid back.  She has been a joy since birth.  So you can see that there are things that I relate to and love about each one.  I don't really have a "favorite".  I might have a "favorite" to go shopping with, or a "favorite" to read a book with because of her funny input. 
What I do know for a fact, is that I don't love one more than the other.  The love is all the same...and it doesn't change whether you have 1 child or 3.  I think it is great to recognize the strengths and uniqueness of each child.  It is normal to favor certain things about different people...
I just wanted to comment on this article because I thought it was super interesting.  Please follow the link below to read the article and share your thoughts about this one!!!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/09/21/parents-with-favorite-child_n_972523.html?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl12%7Csec3_lnk2%7C98239

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Being a Mom is Hard Work. Period.

So I just read an article about someone who stayed home for the week with their children and they realized how hard it was.  Well, that's just shocking.
Seriously? I read these things sometimes and I wonder how people even function with children.  In the article, the woman talked about going to the grocery store with both of her children. GASP.  Lady, get over it.  People do it all the time.  Kids cry and whine...it is not enjoyable but moms get it done. 
She also talked about her son not wanting to eat his lunch. NEWS FLASH...your son will NOT starve to death.  I can assure you.
This is a topic that gets me all hot under the collar.  I think the reason for that is that I would absolutely LOVE to be a stay at home mom.  I worked out of the home as a teacher until my first daughter was over 4 years old and my second daughter was about 10 months old.  Then I decided to stop teaching for a few years and I started a home daycare for teachers (so I would have a similar schedule).  Either way, it is work.  Now, I just work from home. 
No matter which what you slice it, being a mom is hard work.  If you stay home, you don't get a break.  You are with children all the time.  However, if you work out of the home, you still have your kids with you in the evening and on weekends, PLUS you have to find the time to get everything else done.  There is no "I will throw the wash in tomorrow during nap" or "I will run to the store after I drop the kids off at school".  
I am somewhere in the middle of that spectrum. I am home with my kids...but I am HOME.  This is where I work.  There is no break...no running out during the day on my lunch break. 
Some days I wonder what it would be like to drop my daughter off at school.  Since she started preschool over 2 years ago, I have probably taken her to school no more than a dozen times.  I can't imagine dropping her off and taking the other girls to the store, or having the day to putter around the house, or meeting up with friend.  I have my summers to get a little taste if that...and I love it.  We do play dates and swim and "relax" as much as one can with 3 children.
Bottom line, there is no "easy" answer when being a mom.  My friend and I always say that working part time and being home part time is probably the best of both worlds.  But for now, I will continue to work from home.  And you know what, it will be hard work. And so is being a mom who works out of the home...and so is being a stay at home mom.
Being a mom is hard work. PERIOD.
Yet, it is all worth it:)

Monday, September 12, 2011

I Need to Step it UP!

Today my 6 year old told me that I need to wear high heels more often.  She was looking in my closet and said, "Why do you always wear flip flops?  You should wear these (holding a high heeled shoe) more."

Maybe she is right.  But then again, do a pair of heels really fit into my day to day life? Let's see....daycare, laundry, dinner, baths...these are all very glamorous I know, but they don't really call for high heels.

So then I began to think that because my day to day life doesn't call for high heels doesn't mean that I should just let them go to waste.  Why don't I dust them off on the rare occasions that I do get out?  The standard "momiform" that I am usually rocking these days needs a break.  I think most of my solid color tees, capris, and flip flops have about had it.  Thank god cooler weather is just around the corner.

So tonight I made a pledge to myself to try to step it up every now and then.  I will put makeup on AND curl my hair...imagine that! I will decide to go with the heels instead of the comfortable, more sensible option.  I will treat myself to a pedicure.  I will buy something for myself and not feel guilty about it.   

Maybe I need to start looking to my 6 year old for direction when it comes to fashion.  After all, she is always looking to me for everything else.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Obstacles to Weight Loss

It is time for me to stop making excuses and start making changes to my lifestyle in order to lose the "baby weight" that I have accumulated over the past 6 years and 3 babies.  I have been running since May and have lost a whole 3 whopping pounds...not quite what I was hoping for.  This week, I will begin to change my diet in order to really get the ball rolling (via Weight Watchers...because apparently I need to pay for someone to weigh me each week in order to lose weight).  I have been thinking about it lately and have realized that is doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what the problem is here.  There are a few glaringly obvious obstacles to my weight loss.  Here they are:

1.  Eating what my children leave behind
I need to tell myself that is is okay to throw out what my children don't eat.  It is not a waste...what it is is throwing out trash (scraps of food that I should NOT feel the need to eat).  I am not doing myself any favors by eating those last few bites of mac and cheese.  The little bit of a hot dog that was left behind is better off in the trash (after all, those few bites would probably be about 5 grams of fat that I clearly don't need).

2.  Cooking on the fly
When I do not plan out what we are going to eat for dinner throughout the week, I usually just decide to make whatever is easiest...and sometimes this does not mean it is the healthiest.  This leads me to #3.

3.  Being unprepared with food/ingredients
I must make sure that I have everything I need for healthy, easy dinners.  This means sitting down and making a grocery list that clearly lists everything I need for the week.  Making sure I have everything I need will cut down on ordering out. Sometimes I go to make something for dinner and I find that I am missing something I need.  Instead of running to the store to get it, I find we run for the nearest take out menu.  It needs to stop.

4.  Sheer exhaustion
Sometimes I am so tired at the end of the day, that I decide to say "screw it" and I just eat whatever the hell I want.  I may be tired but making myself a nice salad doesn't have to take that much energy.  I can always make a big salad ahead of time and have it available when I am hungry.  Some people say that they are too busy and tired to find time to eat...why don't I have that problem?

5.  Life
The last obstacle seems to be life.  You only live once and I am sorry, but I refuse to be the person who comes to the party and doesn't eat or have a drink.  I remember going to Weight Watchers meetings in the past and people would talk about their Thanksgiving plans and how they were going to make a special low-cal dish to take to their family dinner.  To be honest, I would tell someone to go take a freakin' hike if they did that at my house on a holiday.  It is great to eat healthy on your own time, but seriously, sometimes you have to just let it go.  I think that as long you are exercising and eating well on a regular basis, you should feel free to splurge on occasion.  I just need to cut back on the splurging whenever the mood strikes me.  Yes, going to a fantasy football draft and having half a dozen beers is fine (in my book)...what is not fine is chalking up the whole weekend as a wash because of one event and have a  free for all with the snacks and booze.

So if I can get past at least 4 of the 5 obstacles, I think I will be successful.  Here's to hoping...