Lately I have been thinking about friendship. True friendship. I will be 35 in less than 2 months and I have many friends that I have known for well over half of my life. I have known my best friends for about 28 years. Crazy.
But what does it mean to be "friends" with someone? Sure, you can have many acquaintances that you see out and you shoot the shit with them, catching up and chatting. But friends, your TRUE bestest of the best friends, are usually few and far between.
I think that is because to be a true friend means many things.
Here is what I think it means:
Caring about someone and truly wanting the best for them. That means if they get a raise, a new house, or a great new job, you are so very happy for them. You are not jealous. Well, you can be a little jealous...but not in a spiteful way. More in like a "Damn, she has 5 1/2 bathrooms and we only have 1 with 3 girls and that's gonna be a nightmare" kind of way.
Being honest. Not brutally honest like, "Your ass looks so big in those pants". But honest like, "Shit, the cable got turned off this morning and I have no clue how I am going to pay for that" or "Maybe you did overreact a little...you spaz" or "Stop bringing me all of these sweets, you skinny be-otch".
Being each other's "people". Think about if something good, bad, horrible, funny, or wonderful happened. Who would you call? Who would you want to tell? Those are your people.
Knowing what is going on with each other. Not only knowing what is happening in each other's lives, but asking about it.
Offering support. Whether is be helping out with the kids or being an outlet and listening. Just being supportive is so important. True friends try to lighten each other's load.
Not judging. You can tell a true friend that you dipped in the kids' savings for vacay or that your 2 year old wore the same outfit all weekend and they will make you feel like it is perfectly acceptable. And they will mean it.
True friends stand the test of time and pick up right where they left off. They trust can each other, with secrets or a favorite pair of shoes. They can laugh with each other and cry with each other...and they can laugh at each other, but in that harmless way that only real friends can. They can pick up the phone and call at any time of the day or night. They can text each other pictures of a strange rash and ask for a totally unqualified diagnosis.
If you have true friends in your life, you are lucky. You are blessed.
There are so many times in life when you find out who your friends are...
Tracy Lawrence, "You Find Out Who Your Friends Are"
One of my favorite songs. And to my friends reading this...you know who you are.