A few months ago I took The Mom Pledge. It basically deals with encouraging and supporting other moms. I am all for this, trust me. But then I was thinking about times that moms tend to judge each other.
Here are some of those times:
1. When a kid is running lose at the park and mom seems completely unaware or just doesn't give a shit. She needs to watch her kid better.
2. When a mom is hovering over her 4 year old at the park like a protective mother bear and doesn't let the kids from her grip. She needs to cut the cord.
3. When a mom announces that her kid sleeps in her bed. OOOHHH, that's not good for you OR the kid.
4. When a mom says her kid is a a GREAT sleeper that never wakes up during the night. Yeah right, she's a liar.
5. When a kid is a picky eater. The mom obviously caters to the child or doesn't try to give them enough variety.
6. When a kid eats everything on their plate. The poor kid must be starving, or is heading for childhood obesity.
7. When the kid acts up in public. Wow, doesn't she ever discipline them!?
8. When the kid is too good in public. Ugh, she thinks her kid is so perfect. Whatever.
9. When mom never goes out anymore. She really needs to get out without her kids. Its so unhealthy to be with your kids all the time like that.
10. When mom goes out all the time. Like Moms Gone Wild. She must NEVER want to be with her kids. I feel bad for them.
11. When a mom always dresses casual. She should take more time for herself. You know, taking a brush to her hair and putting on a little lip gloss wouldn't hurt her.
12. When a mom is always dressed up. Who does she think she is? There is no need for full hair and makeup everyday. She must just neglect her kids while she gets ready every morning.
13. When the house is a mess. She must be a slob. Can't she find time to clean up?
14. When the house is clean. She has got to have a maid! That is the ONLY way that her house can be that clean.
So, as you can see...we are basically damned if we do and damned if we don't. Moms judge each other, whether we mean to do it or not. I am trying to get better at this. I really am. And let's face it, I am the last person that should be judging anyone!
What do you think? Are there some things that you judge others for (even when you know you shouldn't)?
Great post and so true! It's all just a bunch of petty, jealous crap, isn't it? AND don't we all engage in it at some point or another? I will admit that I have judged other moms. When I think about it though it's really about judging myself. When I judge someone it's usually because I am feeling pretty inadequate that day. I'm really thinking: why can't my child sleep through the night?? Why is my hair always uncombed and my house such a mess?? Why can't I get it all together like this seemingly perfect mom in front of me? Maybe she does have a maid and neglect the kids while she gets dressed in the morning. What's so bad about that anyway? I wrote about a freak-out I had when I was ridiculously jealous of one of my friends (god bless her for putting up with me) on my blog if you want to check it out:
ReplyDeletehttp://itsadomelife.blogspot.com/2012/03/existential-panic-attack-brought-on-by.html
OMG I am the parent in many of those examples. I haven;t worn lip loss in years and I live in sweats, oh and my oldest always cleans his plate. HAHA screw it I couldn't care less, I love my life and wouldn't change it for the world. Good post,you have great examples. Oh and by the way, I am a lunch lady and I hate the parents raise picky eaters. And yes, that is the parents fault, totally 100 percent!
ReplyDeleteA very true and precise, to the point post. I try to never be judgmental,in all aspects of my life. I try not to be a hypocrite either. But sometimes we are just human I guess.
ReplyDeleteI used to feel so worried about being judged,and I think I finally just came to the conclusion, that we all are who we are. And I'm doing a pretty good job being a mom :)
Leave the judging for actual Horrible, Awful, Lunatic, Criminal parents. JUDGE AWAY with those scum. But the rest of us? We are all just getting by, doing the best we can.
*Screaming Kids, Picky eaters, super clean houses.....it all 'annoys' me, but I'm not 'judging'. My kids have screamed in the mall. My five year old only eats cheese, I swear! And Super Clean houses, well I am probably just jealous.
Great Post!!!! You really know how to write what we are all thinking. And as far as your question at the end??
I think what I may be guilty of, has to do with teenagers. I would see certain things on facebook, or just teens acting certain ways around town, and I would think "Don't their parents know what they are writing on Facebook? Or Don't their parents know they are standing around the shopping center with their friends cursing/smoking/or other teen things" and now as my teens get older, I am not walking around town holding their hand like when they were five. You can't possibly have eyes on them at ALL times. I teach them right from wrong, and hope for the best! And so far, so good. They are not perfect, but they are making good decisions. But I am not always going to be with them 24 hours a day.
I know it so so hard not to judge...and I also hate the feeling that I am being judged. We all just try our best;)
ReplyDeleteI am glad you all liked it and could relate! Basically I was trying to get the point across that no matter what we do, someone will probably think they can do it better. Well, they can go right ahead and try!! I have to say thought, I get REALLY jealous of people who have clean houses. Can't figure that one out (especially with 3 KIDS).
Yes, we all do it and we all need to get better at not doing it. We are all in the same boat!
ReplyDeleteI fluctuated between being offended and totally agreeing with you. HA! :) You're so right - we need to stop judging other moms!! Thanks for linking up to #findingthefunny!
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