I realized this morning as I was in the shower and my 3 year old kept pulling the shower curtain back and yelling, "Surprise!"...that I have finally lost it.
And by "it" I mean several things.
First, I have lost my privacy. That was glaringly obvious this morning when I couldn't take a 10 minute shower in peace. Even when I am trying to get dressed, it is like a game of 20 questions...what are you wearing? why are you wearing that? What shoes are you going to wear? Please wear high heels. I want to respond, "PLEASE give me one god forsaken second to myself."
In addition to my privacy, I have lost any time to myself between the hours of 7am until about 9pm (on a good night). Let's face it, it is all about the kids. I am lucky if I can shove half a sandwich down my throat at lunch time. I do, however, manage to get about 4 cups of coffee in before mid morning.
I have also lost the luxury of being spontaneous. It is a very rare occasion that we can plan something at the last minute. Everything has to written on the calendar or it is forgotten. Sometimes, I swear that I have short term memory loss. And gone are the days that we can pack up and head out at a moment's notice. It takes a good 30 minutes to get ready for even the simplest of trips.
As I have mentioned in a previous post, I have lost all control of my television. I attempted to watch an episode an "Rocco's Dinner Party" last night...and even though the girls were playing barbies, they would come in the room and reprimand me for changing the channel. Sometimes, I just have to lay down the law and tell them too bad. I send them up to their room to play and I take about 30 minutes to watch something in complete silence...but who am I kidding, that lasts about 5 minutes then my silence in interrupted (usually by blood curdling screams due to an altercation involving a toy that no one ever plays with anyway but for some reason they both want it at the same exact moment).
So this morning in the shower, it became crystal clear to me that I had finally lost "it". But hopefully I will find it again....it about 10 years or so. Here's to hoping!